its morning . so good morning yáll :)
cant sleep and i have and work tomorrow . fuck my life maaaan . and i have my own ortho appointment LOL . can't wait ?

talk about yesterday .

so apparently just about everyone heard or saw what happened today and i'm sure whether to laugh or cry becuase its so hilarious or depressingly sad . and shit . i hate people knowing and seeing me cry .
but yeah . i'm all cool now . and thank you to annabel for everything .
 feeling rather crap for throwing someone into the middle whose name i shall not mention just in case . . but i'm so terribly sorry


had an awesome day at ABW otherwise (:
mad our clips for our ad . MAN i hope it looks cool .
looks tonnes of continuous with the guys and their sunnies and took this super dooper hot one with geofffrey . funniest thing everr
 we were rather unproductive when the men left for sport .
felt remarkably weird and quiet without their randomness and jun's little jokes :P

lol as varshie says its be so funnin if jun and elle get married . they'd have the funniest kiddos ever or something :D
and arthur isn't as bad as he first seems haha

i love my group <3

awesome group msn convo in the evening .
and i thank them all from the bottom of my heart for everything .
and devin and his little song (: sweet kid ~ thank you ever so much for everything
went to buy food for tomorrow because i had nothing to do and delaney darling with there and gave me a discount :D
then walked into prabs (:


and for castro . i forgot how great our conversations were and how tight we were . thank you for being there and understanding everything <3








so much stuff going on in one go and everythings going insane . i stay awake wondering what tomorrow will bring and the prospect of the new day . a new start . and more hurdles to jump . maybe everything will get better . everywhere .
   today - for the first time in a year , i wanted to run away again . from everything . pull the fly net again , crawl out the window and just keep running .
one thing at a time i can handle . its either home , or him . both at once . i cant handle . especially when everyone around just starts to crumble down too .

i never realised the impact that he had on her either . and now my petty problems seem stupid and riduculous . she's stronger than me and brave enough to ask her help .
 


i never realised how many people were out there pushing me up . and all i want to say is thank you





off to write up reports and sound posh and continually bullshit (:
promised devin i would get one done - so much for that aish







<3

lessons learnt
and bridges burnt to the ground
and its too late now to put out the fire