ELLO


yes i changed my blogskin .
something a little bit more 'me' :)
and my style 
but i can't really seem to find one which is just like everything about me lol .
how confusing i am
and yes . that blue is the kinda blue i want for contacts ^^ aint they sexy ? like *coughhotcoughprimarycoughguycough* the FORCE - you get me ?? ;]



pree cool day today
minus getting all my marks back . . 
just a bit mad . but then i realised my head was out of the game during that week which makes me feel bleh . .
lecture from hatton today .
 apart from that . school was same old same old .


oh babes . she still doesn't know i don't think . didn't tell so should be all good . (Y)



i'm mad because beauty and the geek won't work and i wanted to watch :(
how stupid is that .
reminds me of seeing tyler on :D
oh what a cutie piee 
had a really great chat with annabel today . :)
oh i miss my baby . she made me all better <3




hung out with delaney after school today :)
went for a long walk and d&m . aish . feels good to talk to someone who kind of thinks like me :)
or well . is less cryptic i guess . how i'm meant to be :)
little man to look up to i guess . well more like a reallyy tall guy to look up to :P LOL . i'm so funny . 
haven't had a really long genuine chat with him in foreverrr .
aish need to organise an outing for us in the holidays . going to K and MB .  AHHH can't wait till then :)

and the shopping spree with jiani babes
and the beach
and pool
and dance
and .
everything :)




and can't wait till tomorrow !! :DDDD
haven't asked my mummy yet but **fingers crossed** ^^
should be allowedd !
i love my little a-WHORE-ah :) - i wish they'd actually let us put cool stuff like that on our yr 12 jerseys
and i'm guessing lawrence would love to know LOLOLOL - A . i think i can go swimming tomorrow :P HAHA

did i mention that i accidently squished my finger between the door . like the garage door . the ones you pull down >.<
i wasn't watching - clearly . and shoved my stupid finger in there when it was closing .
and i swear it's like blue but NUUU . i can't see because it's already black with nail polish >.>


i may just possibly have the coolest mum ever :)
she doesn't care about my exam marks anymore and she said as long as a tried my hardest <3
oh a few months back i told her everything that had happened and all my issues . and she's been helping me ever since and reading stupid books and what not :)
i love my mummy <3
thank you for everything you did for me and you continue to do everyday ~





anyway
so thinking about the discussion that i've been having with delaney and wiggleboy
and we talking on the topic of faith .
WELL me kinda babbling and blubbering of about my life and them giving me good little advice ^^ 
so let me go into one of sam's infamous long essaylike blog posts i love so much :)


faith is complete trust or confidence in someone or something . believing without having to see to believe . believing with the heart , soul and mind . personally , i believe it's the highest level of trust anyone can really achieve . in today's society , we generally use the word 'faith' to describe religious beliefs and the feelings and / or emotions associated . but that's not the one that i'm really concerning or thinking about right this moment , in this context. i mean today our world is so bleh [wait so not a formal sam thing to say  *coughcough*] - rather . difficult ? and i guess we all know someone who's down or need someone there . or someone to trust or something to pull them up again . and for some it's been a long trek and there's some major decisions we have to make or a lot of things on our minds . sometimes i just wonder the many thousand reasons we just don't trust each other . fully . or not at all . let alone faith . or anything else .

just a thought 


_________________________________________________________________________________

Write the first thing that comes to mind. - leeched off a-whore-ah's  fb because i'm a troll MEEP

01 Hello: BOOO . scared you :)
02 Love: AHAHA . what ?
03 Cow: GAO . anorah :P
04 Peace: HIPPIE
05 Sky: sun
06 Mr. Big: Mrs Small
07 Horror: your mum :)

Answer with only one word.
01 You are a: person
02 You drink: COFFEEEE
03 Your first kiss: HEHE
04 Where are you: stalker
05 You like: black
06 Hate is: stupid
07 Love is: non-exististent ? [got to come back to you on that one]
08 You dream of: perfect world [cheated . that was two worlds . but i mean it ]
09 You can’t spell: shiney / shiny
10 Your favourite colour is: black [ OH WAIT . someone ruined my childhood by saying that is wasn't a colour . . but a shade . WTH >.>]

Answer either yes or no. No “maybes” allowed.
01 You like a boy/girl: yes
02 You would kiss someone for $10: yes [if i knew them and they weren't gross :P]
03 You’re addicted to facebook: eww no
04 You’re addicted to notes: nope
05 Pink looks nice on guys: NOO
06 You can’t keep a secret: noooope [meaning i can . .]
07 Do you have any siblings: yes <3
08 You know what an asterisk is: mhm
09 You dye your hair: yes - shall redo later :)

Write the first thing each colour makes you think of.
01 Red: blood
02 Green: grass
03 Teal: braces coloured modules
04 Maroon: EWPS !
05 Silver: robot
06 Brown: poo
07 White: weddings
08 Peachy: thing i saw on formspring - courtesy of a-whore-ah
09 Yellow: sun
10 Purple: top my mother bought me and i shall never ever ever wear . 








<3

  just a song stuck in my head that just says everything on my mind

 
It's probably what's best for you 
I only want the best for you  
and if I'm not the best then you're stuck
I tried to sever ties and I 
ended up with wounds to bind  
like you're pouring salt in my cuts
And I just ran out of band aids  
I don't even know where to start 
cause you can bandage the damage 
you never really can fix a heart

Even now I know what's wrong  
how could I be so sure  
if you never say what you feel, feel
I must have held you hand so tight  
you didn't have the will to fight 
I guess you needed more time to heal
Baby I just ran out of band aids  
I don't even know where to start  
cause you can bandage the damage  
you never really can fix a heart

You must be a miracle worker  
swearing up and down you can fix what's been broken yeah  
please don't get my hopes up no no 
baby tell me how could you be so cruel
It's like you're pouring salt on my cuts

Baby I just ran out of band aids 
I don't even know where to start  
cause you can bandage the damage  
you never really can fix a heart
Baby I just ran out of band aids 
I don't even know where to start  
cause you can bandage the damage  
you never really can fix a heart  
oh no no no  
you never really can fix a heart  
oh no no no you never really can fix a heart



You never really can fix my heart